August 20, 2008

Eek! Mini-Hiatus!

Due to my temporary 3-month move to Chicago this coming Saturday morning (ugh, I'm going to cry on the plane anyway), I may not update for a bit. But you should be used to that, I'm pretty bad with updating.

Either way, here are some things you have to look forward to on UMCB once I settle in near Magnificent Mile (foreseeable overdrafting!):

  • A long-awaited interview with vocalist, Bella Saona of The Fire and Reason
  • Crazy pictures from my official going-away party at White Room
  • Why there should be a difference in the daytime and nighttime contents of your bag
  • Beginning to my track progress on the Karl Lagerfeld Diet
  • Miami AND Chicago Shit-to-Do (nightlife and events)
I will still definitely be updating my Twitter via texts and maybe my brand-spanking-new tumblr, so follow me on those in the meantime!

Wish me luck with flying with my liquids (97 lipglosses, counted today) and sharp weapons (stilettos)! Love you all!

August 15, 2008


My official going-away party is tonight at White Room.

There's NO cover, open bar (free vodka!) 10-11 and first 10 minutes of every hour, the best DJs: Johnny Strokes, AL B Rotten, and De La Vega (Diego + Dalton), and you should should come to see me for one of my last party nights in Miami, bitches!

1306 N. Miami Ave
Miami, FL 33136

Be there or else you're stupid.

The flyer is in the previous post.

August 14, 2008

I'm going to cry in the airport...

...and it's gonna be like a movie. I'll hug my parents, grab my bags, and board the plane in slow-mo. And the guy sitting next to me on the plane will be playing some sap Coldplay or Keane song loud enough to be the soundtrack to it all. 

And then I'll get over it and become semi-famous in a new city.

I will be moving to Chicago for three or so months in 8 days (leaving Saturday morning). Although Chicago seems like an awesome city, my heart will always be in Miami. I'm going to miss this city so much! I'll even miss the assholes that weave in and out of lanes on the 836, the crazy bums that I pay off to look after my car (Troy the Wonderboy and Al, specifically) and the tourist-littered beaches. But most of all I'm going to miss my PARTY PEOPLE. What will I do without you guys? Geez.

Well, you all should know me already -- I'm having a bomb-ass going-away party tomorrow courtesy of White Room and my favorite men at MiamiNights. You need to come by and show me some lovin' before I go! Alas, this will not be my last night out at the clubs (I may host eXposure on Monday at White Room again) but it is the official party for me. It's also going to be Dalton's last night in Miami as well so you really should be there for his last set in the 305. Bring all of your friends, it's going to be popping! I whipped up a quick little flyer yesterday for it:

(Click the flyer to see it larger.)

And of course, the obligatory shit-to-do list, new and improved with Facebook event links (if available):

Thursday, August 14th (today)

Money$hot @ The Vagabond (flyer)
Feat. Los Borrachos Tour w/ DJ Craze & Dave Nada
2-4-1 drinks 10-11pm and 3-4am, $10 cover

APT Presents Red Room Thursdays (flyer)
Feat. Ray Milian, Jonathan & Josh
2-4-1 drinks 1-2am, comp shot for all @ 2am, 25 cent cover (?!)

Guilty Pleasures @ Aero Bar
Feat. DJ Ross One, Mark Leventhal & Artime

Friday, August 15th

My Going-Away Party/Fracture @ White Room (flyer is above, duh)
Feat. DJs Johnny Strokes, AL B Rotten and De La Vega
Open bar 10-11pm and the first 10 minutes of every hour!

Saturday, August 16th

Poplife Presents: Paid Vacation @ White Room (flyer)
With IHMDJ and a live performance from Juiceboxxx
Fly Girl boutique in the Red Room, open bar 10-11pm

Jose & Branden Present: THISISIT @ Miami Art Space (flyer)
No alchy, but an awesome dance party in an awesome space nontheless!
Feat. DJs Dasme, Berryteback, Soobwoop & Rangotango

Coming soon on UMCB... an interview with The Fire and Reason!


P.S. If you don't have me added on MySpace yet, get at me!

August 11, 2008

eXposure Tonight @ White Room with DJ Scottie B!

(Click the flyer to see it larger.)

UMCB is turning into a bulletin board for flyers for shit going down at White Room, haha.

You need to come by tonight for eXposure at White Room! We managed to get the amazing Scottie B all the way from B-more (that's Baltimore for all you non-hipsters) to spin tonight! 2-4-1 specials and only $3 cover. It's going to be amazing. Oh yeah, and I'm hosting again so I'll be there to dance and act rowdy with you. What more could you want, honestly?

P.S. Last night I locked my keys in my car at 5:30am  like a fucking idiot. NEVER EVER call a locksmith at that time. That shit cost me $187 for a guy who barely spoke English to jimmy my shit open with a clipboard and a wire hanger in 30 seconds. Henceforth I'm going to be kind of acting broke-and-cheap for a couple days. Lowerclassbitch. But only till Friday, hopefully.

August 8, 2008

An Awesome New Friday Party!

Hopefully I'll see all of you tonight at The White Room for FRACTURE, a new weekly Friday party with the most ridick open bar plan. Get this: free drinks from 12am-1am AND during the first 15 minutes of every hour onward.

The flyer is a little scary, but it's not a secret Goth Night. Promise. Maybe it's called Fracture cause you'll get so mad trashed you'll leave with broken bones? Not sure. Either way, be there and give me a drunken hug! No cover here, duh.

Plus my boy Dalton is going to be DJ-ing this shit, check him out and download some of his tracks and mixes! He won't be here in the 305 much longer, be sure to come tonight and check him out.

Click the flyer to enlarge it!

August 7, 2008

FINALLY Murk'd Pics and Shit to Do This Weekend!

Okay so am I the biggest procrastinator or what?? Here the pictures are, finally, from "The Big Sleep" Murk'd art party at PS14 from last Thursday. It's been a year since this happened in Clubland.

Fellow model Sam and myself got "bodypainted" (more like, graffiti-doodled and taped-up) by local arteests AholSniffsGlue and 131/Data-D while Salami Fingaz ripped it up behind us with everything from downtempo houseyness to Wu Tang.

With exhibit curators and masterminds Parable and Movie Boy.

(click for larger versions)
Photos by Chipi of, check there for more pictures of the event!

And now for the original UMCB "Shit to Do" section of this update (* indicates a weekly party):

Thursday, August 7th (today)

Pimpin' In The Red Room @ White Room (flyer)
Feat DJs Otto von Schirach, Peasants with Feathers and more
18+ w/ID $5 Cover. Drink specials all night, doors open @ 10

Money$hot @ The Vagabond * (flyer)
Welcoming back DJ Contra from the Coldplay/Santogold tour!
2-4-1s from 10-11pm and 3-4am, doors open @ 10

Saturday, August 9th

AquaBooty Raleigh Hotel Summer Sessions (flyer)
Feat. NYC's DJ Mr. V and more. 21+ only.
I have 2 poolside event tickets to give away, e-mail/IM me if you want them GONE!
Otherwise RSVP for guestlist to for the pool party
Buy pre-sale Penthouse after-party tickets here

Poplife presents Popart @ White Room * (flyer)
$1 SNOWCONES!!!!!!!! Haha, perfect for a steamy Miami night.
And no cover plus 2-4-1s before 12.

More shit to do coming soon!

P.S. Want more traffic on your nightlife/party pic/fashion/music/slightly-related site? Me too. Exchange links with me!

August 5, 2008


I was just about to do an update with those pictures from PS14 on Thursday night (where I got "bodypainted") when I realized that I haven't slept in about 40 hours. So I stopped, and said I'll do this tomorrow. Check and follow me on my Twitter meanwhile for more sporadic random updates on what I'm doing throughout the day. I often update from my phone in the car or when I'm getting my pedi and I'm bored. I'm funny, promise.

Because I don't want to seem like a complete tease with these pictures I've been promising, here's a picture of me getting graffiti'd up by Gustavo from the back:

Click it for the larger version.

Frontal pictures tomorrow!!!! WOOO!!

And now I'm thinking that I'm still slightly out of my mind because I'm writing a post about deciding to not write a post because I need to go to sleep before I die. Look at me, still rambling on and on about shit you don't particularly care about!

So I will now go to sleep without really having much sense of what time it is and pretend to be a normal human being.

What's the longest you've gone without sleep?

August 1, 2008

TGIS! The Week In Review..

So while I wait for what seems like forever for the pictures from last night's Murk'd party "The Big Sleep" at PS14, here's the week in review. 

I'll throw some pictures at you from this past Monday's Exposure party which just so happened to be a panty party AND Krystle's birthday as well. I anticipated only a couple girls showing up in underwear, but hell, it got super-packed, super-fast. A birthday platter of cookies and brownies adorned the corner of the bar while The Unicorn King graced our presence as usual as more and more of us (including myself) stripped down to our underthings. DJ Johnny Stokes helped take our minds off of the room being a hellpit with some awesome jams.

What's that? You want pictures? Unfortunately, our normal party pic go-to, Justin, was absent so we had a kind of community photography effort. Phear our superior point-and-shoot skillzz!!!!11!!

... I don't know what you're thinking, but I'm sure it's along the lines of, "Dayum." Perhaps.

Tuesday and Wednesday I stayed in (or at least from the downtown area). Thursday was Money$hot at the Vagabond. The backyard was closed off the entire night, which allowed for the air conditioning to fully fill and circulate through both rooms. I was celebrating my friend Stephanie's birthday that night, so I wasn't all too much of the cynical socialite I usually am. I mean, it was your normal Money$hot. Indie rock, you know? Not really my thing. Whatevs.

Friday was the new Sound Clash night at The White Room with DJs Johnny Stokes, Dalton and Diego O. There was something weird going on at first (electrical, I think) so we all got in around 10:30-ish instead of 10, when the open bar was supposed to begin. Unfortunately, the party was a little bit of a bust at first. The crowd came, drank, and went when open bar was over at 12. And Johnny Stokes couldn't spin cause of an equipment fuck-up. Dalton tore it up meanwhile. Then we had a surprise set from DJ GRRRPWR! And then it all went dead around 3-something. Whatever, I had fun. Heard The Vagabond was dead for the most part too.

And then Saturday I made sure to hit up the entire holy trinity... Poplife/Rock the Bells Afterparty at White Room, Back Door Bamby at the Vagabond, and PS14 for Otto von Schirach. Poplife was decent, but there were more people at Back Door. I walked in during the middle of a performance, chilled out for a bit in the back room (the front room music isn't really my thing), and then wandered over to PS14 in time to watch the last half hour of Nastie and Otto being crazy on-stage. It was a pretty eventful night.

Oh and shit to do you have to do (especially seeing these pictures from the last one...) :

I'm hosting that shit bitches! (Just never call me Alexandra. Lix, please.)